350. Guilt and Shame

My mom convinced her aide worker to bring her by for an unexpected visit.  I have a bad cold and had barely woke up from a much needed afternoon nap. She wasn't making much sense. She talked for several minutes about things we couldn't quite understand and we convinced her it was best to go back home and rest. She agreed and left. I didn't ask her to sit down and talk. I didn't invite her to stay for dinner. She seemed more like a stranger at the moment than my mother.  I went and laid back down until my own brain fully woke up. And then I became overwhelmed with guilt... or was it shame? She probably needed familiar family more than anything.

I am half Jewish and half Catholic. A friend that shares this similar up bringing and I decided that in the end this leads to a life of guilt and shame. I already wrote about guilt in this blog months ago, so today, it's shame.